Yesterday, we disassembled and assembled the Ford 5.4L V8 engine as if for the competition. The rules given to us changed a little. Only two of the pistons have to be taken out and the crank stays in, which makes the whole process much easier and faster. In our first try we had the time of 43 minutes, in the second run 35 minutes. I am sure we will improve once we get hang of it and use proper tools. In the last run I twisted off the 3/8-to-1/4 conversion socket. Tools are expensive.
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busy, busy
Recently I have been working at Adam's a lot , three, or four times a week. On Weekdays I go there at 7AM, which means I have to leave home right after 6AM. Hard. So I go to Adam's, learn a lot, hands-on, go back, change over, go to school, engine practice, regular class after that and so on until 11:30PM, then I got home after midhight...
I guess that is why I did not do too many blogs lately.
I guess that is why I did not do too many blogs lately.
Philadelphia suburbs.
I love the suburbs, especially those old stone walled houses under tall trees and meandring little streets following the rolling hills. Even at the end of November you can feel nature all around, it is almost green like the summer never left. The houses wrapped in the beautifully fenced yards, tucked away under the cover of the trees. Inviting and private at the same time, almost familiar and friendly.
The houses feel genuine, all of different shape, mostly made of stone, they don't appear to be pre-fabricated like those in the midwest America. They are true homes, each with it's history and generations of family that lived in it for decades.
The houses feel genuine, all of different shape, mostly made of stone, they don't appear to be pre-fabricated like those in the midwest America. They are true homes, each with it's history and generations of family that lived in it for decades.
The difference
After our hearbreaking trip thru Philadelphia, we visited the west suburbs where Ji would work and where her friends live. Figuratively speaking, the difference between those suburbs and the city is like night-and-day. Houses, still old and cute, are well maintained, yards taken care of, clean, inviting and warm. A dream place to live in.
I have lived in many countries, cultures that had different financial backgrounds and I made one observation. The surroundings of the place is a reflection of the CULTURE people represent, not their financial means, race, or nationality. There are people in the sub-tropics that do not have running water, or electricity, and their houses are clean, taken care of and inviting. There are reed-thatched houses in rural Japan that are radiant, neat and cozy.
The contrast between Philly and its suburbs is more than the black-and-white. True, you will be hard press to find a white folk in the city, outside downtown, or vice-versa for the suburbs. Let's not fall for an easy-out racial explanation. Excuses are not helping anybody.
Both Philly and burbs have beautifully build houses, but each represents different cultures. Cultures of individuals that inhibit them. Be it rich, poor, black, white, or white-trash, or whoever else it is, even the poorest can be afford to clean up their yard, clean the windows and once in a long while paint the house trims. It is really a question of personal pride in a place you live in.
For all I care those people may choose to live in the caves, but for God-sake, sweep up the cave entrance, don't make it a pig-pan. Not everyone wants to live with the pigs.
I have lived in many countries, cultures that had different financial backgrounds and I made one observation. The surroundings of the place is a reflection of the CULTURE people represent, not their financial means, race, or nationality. There are people in the sub-tropics that do not have running water, or electricity, and their houses are clean, taken care of and inviting. There are reed-thatched houses in rural Japan that are radiant, neat and cozy.
The contrast between Philly and its suburbs is more than the black-and-white. True, you will be hard press to find a white folk in the city, outside downtown, or vice-versa for the suburbs. Let's not fall for an easy-out racial explanation. Excuses are not helping anybody.
Both Philly and burbs have beautifully build houses, but each represents different cultures. Cultures of individuals that inhibit them. Be it rich, poor, black, white, or white-trash, or whoever else it is, even the poorest can be afford to clean up their yard, clean the windows and once in a long while paint the house trims. It is really a question of personal pride in a place you live in.
For all I care those people may choose to live in the caves, but for God-sake, sweep up the cave entrance, don't make it a pig-pan. Not everyone wants to live with the pigs.
Philadelphia
We went to East Coast for a Thankgiving weekend to see the surroundings of Philadelphia, or more precisely Bala, the planned work-place of Ji.
Philadelphia is an old town with a lot of picturesque houses, they are cute and colorful and in total disrepair. Driving thru the city is heart-breaking, houses that in Chicago would cost $300K and up, are neglected, broken-down, turned into the neighborhoods of poverty. Seems like nobody cares where they live and how they live. No personal pride. I hope that something can save it, but it will not be soon. People that live in there have to get some pride in their neighborhoods. It may take more than a generation of genuine effort. I heard that taxes in the city are higher, not surprising considering the amount of poverty they need to support. How ironic, the poverty costs more to support! Philadelphia is on the spiral downward.
Philadelphia is an old town with a lot of picturesque houses, they are cute and colorful and in total disrepair. Driving thru the city is heart-breaking, houses that in Chicago would cost $300K and up, are neglected, broken-down, turned into the neighborhoods of poverty. Seems like nobody cares where they live and how they live. No personal pride. I hope that something can save it, but it will not be soon. People that live in there have to get some pride in their neighborhoods. It may take more than a generation of genuine effort. I heard that taxes in the city are higher, not surprising considering the amount of poverty they need to support. How ironic, the poverty costs more to support! Philadelphia is on the spiral downward.
Internship.
I am excited, I got an internship in a large repair shop/dealership. Finally, I will be able to do some hand-on for real. For now I will start couple times a week, on Saturdays for one.
Dealership internship?
I got an email from one dealership I visited a few weeks back.
They would be interested in having me for internship. I think I will jump on it. A hand-on practice and the resume fact that I have been working in the dealership will help me a lot. The problem is time. I still have Saturdays open, which is good, on Mondays and Wednesdays we will see. Of course I will have engine rebuild practice, too.
They would be interested in having me for internship. I think I will jump on it. A hand-on practice and the resume fact that I have been working in the dealership will help me a lot. The problem is time. I still have Saturdays open, which is good, on Mondays and Wednesdays we will see. Of course I will have engine rebuild practice, too.
Supra is back together.
I finished putting my Supra together last Thursday night, some friends from school helped me to set the ignition right because it was off couple of degrees. So far I drove her for 15 miles and she seems to be holding together. Nothing leaking that I can see. Temperature is staying right. The engine light is on, but that is to be expected after removal of EGR. Let's hope for the best. The clutch replacement is next.
Late night work
I was preparing JavaDocs for the project I am working on. Time to go sleep. At least that's what my friend from Europe pointed out.
Life truism..
"Despite your best efforts, you cannot read in a bathtub forever, the hunger will eventually drive you out"
Engine rebuild competition qualifications
This morning I went to qualify for the Ford 5.4L SOHC V8 engine rebuild competition. There were some 25 guys (and gals) out of the 500 we have in the school. We had to take a practice engine (4-cylinder) head off, take the piston out, the caps, the crankshaft, put everything together properly and torque it to specs. Instructors were checking each step and timing the total. Droping any significant part was 60 secound penelty, dropping a wrench was a 30-second penelty.
I felt like a misfit, guys seemed so much more knowledgable and experienced, I NEVER ever took, or put in, the piston in the cylinder.
Anyway, I drew number 14, fairly in the middle, three people were tested at the time.
While waiting (watching was not allowed), we ocasionally heard things being dropped. John, my classmate, said he even dropped a whole engine when he was turning it upside down on the mount! people were coming back after some 20-30 minutes all sweaty and tired. I thought I will be sorry for having my usual several layers on.
When my turn came, I was trying not to rush, and pay attention not to drop anything. The piston cap had hard time comming off, I lost little time there, the piston itself did not want to come off. I noticed the other guy was ahead of me. From that moment on everything went smooth and fast. I finished good few minutes before the guy.
Well, I will know on Monday if I qualify, I am hopeful.
Humbly, I will say that I will NOT qualify if the Superman, He-Man, Spider-Man and their twin brothers were competing agaist me, otherwise I should be in. We will see.
The teacher/judge seemed impressed.
Oh, and the King-Kong ain't got shit on me!
I felt like a misfit, guys seemed so much more knowledgable and experienced, I NEVER ever took, or put in, the piston in the cylinder.
Anyway, I drew number 14, fairly in the middle, three people were tested at the time.
While waiting (watching was not allowed), we ocasionally heard things being dropped. John, my classmate, said he even dropped a whole engine when he was turning it upside down on the mount! people were coming back after some 20-30 minutes all sweaty and tired. I thought I will be sorry for having my usual several layers on.
When my turn came, I was trying not to rush, and pay attention not to drop anything. The piston cap had hard time comming off, I lost little time there, the piston itself did not want to come off. I noticed the other guy was ahead of me. From that moment on everything went smooth and fast. I finished good few minutes before the guy.
Well, I will know on Monday if I qualify, I am hopeful.
Humbly, I will say that I will NOT qualify if the Superman, He-Man, Spider-Man and their twin brothers were competing agaist me, otherwise I should be in. We will see.
The teacher/judge seemed impressed.
Oh, and the King-Kong ain't got shit on me!
After the school.
Every night I am coming home at midnight, the girls are asleep already, usually both in my bed. It is always fun to look at them sleeping.
Yesterday, Ji scared me because baby was completely covered, only little hand sticking out, but Lili did not mind it I guess. Normally, if she is face-down, or otherwise covered, she gives a really good fight for her freedom.
I eat, wash up, and do something like reading a book, etc, I am not very sleepy right after I come home. Finally, I go sleep. Ji eventually will bring baby to her own bed, so I can enjoy my own bed.
Yesterday, Ji scared me because baby was completely covered, only little hand sticking out, but Lili did not mind it I guess. Normally, if she is face-down, or otherwise covered, she gives a really good fight for her freedom.
I eat, wash up, and do something like reading a book, etc, I am not very sleepy right after I come home. Finally, I go sleep. Ji eventually will bring baby to her own bed, so I can enjoy my own bed.
School is A-OK.
We rebuilt so far 3-speed and 4-speed manual transmissions. I think I got them down. I wrote a test today on clutches all correct. Teacher said it is a first time anybody has done it.
Today, I was watching and reading about MIT's AUVs. I am considering Ocean Engineering or Mechanical Engineeing major with Software & Electronics minors. This may probably change, but right now that is what I dream about.
The A.A. degree from LTI, B.S. from MIT, Cornell, Berkley or other college, and masters at MIT. If not maybe BMW STEP program.
In any case, I think I will teach in the future.
I just hope I have energy and resources to continue and finish school with 4.0 GPA, or close at least.
Today, I was watching and reading about MIT's AUVs. I am considering Ocean Engineering or Mechanical Engineeing major with Software & Electronics minors. This may probably change, but right now that is what I dream about.
The A.A. degree from LTI, B.S. from MIT, Cornell, Berkley or other college, and masters at MIT. If not maybe BMW STEP program.
In any case, I think I will teach in the future.
I just hope I have energy and resources to continue and finish school with 4.0 GPA, or close at least.
1500 cc makes 265 hp?
I have seen a turbo-charged 1500 cc snowmobiles making 260 hp on TV.
Makes you think if the American 5000 cc - 7500 cc engines are really that much of a good idea. They are heavy, they burn a lot and are not efficient.
Small volume multi-cylinder turbo engine would be much better.
But that is no news for European makers of relatively small V8 to V12 street engines. The more cylinders, the smoother the engine runs, also the heavier it becomes.
F1 cars use 3000 cc (183 cin), V10 to produce 850 hp with top speed of 230 mph.
Indy cars use turbocharged V8 2650 cc (161.703 cin) to produce 800 hp with top speed of 240 mph.
quoting...
"F1 Mauricio Gugelmin at an average speed of 240.942 mph [387.7586 km/h], was the fastest official lap in auto racing history ... Also had a practice lap of 242.333 mph [389.9972 km/h] prior to qualifying, the fastest unofficial lap in auto racing history ... Recorded the fastest race lap in the U.S. 500 at Michigan Speedway ..."
Top Le Mans speed is car #16 Dome Judd driven by Jan Lammers at 332.7 km/h.
Top speed of course does little good for races like Le Mans, where the corner speed handling is as importnant.
Makes you think if the American 5000 cc - 7500 cc engines are really that much of a good idea. They are heavy, they burn a lot and are not efficient.
Small volume multi-cylinder turbo engine would be much better.
But that is no news for European makers of relatively small V8 to V12 street engines. The more cylinders, the smoother the engine runs, also the heavier it becomes.
F1 cars use 3000 cc (183 cin), V10 to produce 850 hp with top speed of 230 mph.
Indy cars use turbocharged V8 2650 cc (161.703 cin) to produce 800 hp with top speed of 240 mph.
quoting...
"F1 Mauricio Gugelmin at an average speed of 240.942 mph [387.7586 km/h], was the fastest official lap in auto racing history ... Also had a practice lap of 242.333 mph [389.9972 km/h] prior to qualifying, the fastest unofficial lap in auto racing history ... Recorded the fastest race lap in the U.S. 500 at Michigan Speedway ..."
Top Le Mans speed is car #16 Dome Judd driven by Jan Lammers at 332.7 km/h.
Top speed of course does little good for races like Le Mans, where the corner speed handling is as importnant.
Hot, dark and smooth pleasure...
Oh, Brazil!
Sometimes you just feel like you could indulge yourself in that hot, dark and smooth pleasure that carries a little spice in your everyday life...
I've had a taste for a hot chacolate for a while now, to add fuel to the fire, I just read something about it.
The trouble is the american "hot chocolates" are anything but the chocolate and they make them with water to delute it even more! Oooh, 99.9% caffeine free! Can you believe it? Next thing they will water-down the beer. Shit they've done it already!
So I looked on the Web:
A recipe from 1644 of Antonio Colmenero de Ledesma is: 100 cacao beans 2 chillis ( black pepper may be substituted ) A handful of anise "ear flower" 2 mecasuchiles [ mecaxochitl ] (lacking the above two spices, powdered roses of Alexandria may be used) 1 vanilla 2 oz [ 60 g ] cinnamon 12 almonds and as many hazelnuts 1/2 lb [ 450 g ] sugar.
Well, it is a shame I don't have these basic (?) ingredients in my cupboard!
I found a good article at
http://www.ambergriscaye.com/pages/mayan/cacao.html
Boil up 12 ounces of water -- pour into a blender which has --
6 large Jabenero Chilli Peppers
2 ounces honey
2 table spoons (heaping) Roma Cacoa "powder"
Blend thoroughly.
Drink in tiny sips -- over at least one hour!!
For the people that may try this -- start with 1/4 of one jabenaro pepper. It takes about two years to "build" up to a real chocolatl drinker!!
I will need to go and hunt for a cocoa powder and some good chillies to start with...
I will stick to basics:
cocoa powder,
milk,
chilli,
vanilla / cinamon,
honey
Sometimes you just feel like you could indulge yourself in that hot, dark and smooth pleasure that carries a little spice in your everyday life...
I've had a taste for a hot chacolate for a while now, to add fuel to the fire, I just read something about it.
The trouble is the american "hot chocolates" are anything but the chocolate and they make them with water to delute it even more! Oooh, 99.9% caffeine free! Can you believe it? Next thing they will water-down the beer. Shit they've done it already!
So I looked on the Web:
A recipe from 1644 of Antonio Colmenero de Ledesma is: 100 cacao beans 2 chillis ( black pepper may be substituted ) A handful of anise "ear flower" 2 mecasuchiles [ mecaxochitl ] (lacking the above two spices, powdered roses of Alexandria may be used) 1 vanilla 2 oz [ 60 g ] cinnamon 12 almonds and as many hazelnuts 1/2 lb [ 450 g ] sugar.
Well, it is a shame I don't have these basic (?) ingredients in my cupboard!
I found a good article at
http://www.ambergriscaye.com/pages/mayan/cacao.html
Boil up 12 ounces of water -- pour into a blender which has --
6 large Jabenero Chilli Peppers
2 ounces honey
2 table spoons (heaping) Roma Cacoa "powder"
Blend thoroughly.
Drink in tiny sips -- over at least one hour!!
For the people that may try this -- start with 1/4 of one jabenaro pepper. It takes about two years to "build" up to a real chocolatl drinker!!
I will need to go and hunt for a cocoa powder and some good chillies to start with...
I will stick to basics:
cocoa powder,
milk,
chilli,
vanilla / cinamon,
honey
A day wasted is an opportunity missed.
My school is associated with BMW STEP program, a 7-month training(six hours a day five days a week) with BMW for elite graduates from the post-secondary automotive schools.
BMW STEP
I just watched a test drive of new BWM 530i series, not even sold in USA yet. Adaptive lights, adaptive steering, suspension, what not. Years ahead of competition, I guess BMW is one of those brands that make studying automotive technology meaningful.
According to the latest figures from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, the nation has 60,000 unfilled auto-service jobs; by 2010, that number will rise to 150,000. Why the shortages? “The grease-monkey image is still common,” says BMW North America chief Tom Purves. But graduates of BMW’s 27-week, tuition-free training program average $55,000 in starting salaries, with the potential to exceed $100,000 as they reach “master service technician” status.
"A service technician today has more technical knowledge than that held by an automotive engineer 15 years ago," BMW's STEP manager Brian Nelson says.
BMW STEP
I just watched a test drive of new BWM 530i series, not even sold in USA yet. Adaptive lights, adaptive steering, suspension, what not. Years ahead of competition, I guess BMW is one of those brands that make studying automotive technology meaningful.
According to the latest figures from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, the nation has 60,000 unfilled auto-service jobs; by 2010, that number will rise to 150,000. Why the shortages? “The grease-monkey image is still common,” says BMW North America chief Tom Purves. But graduates of BMW’s 27-week, tuition-free training program average $55,000 in starting salaries, with the potential to exceed $100,000 as they reach “master service technician” status.
"A service technician today has more technical knowledge than that held by an automotive engineer 15 years ago," BMW's STEP manager Brian Nelson says.
Finished first class at LTI
I finished the first class at Lincoln Technical Institute, 101 Intro to Automotive Technology. I know it is not much, but I got 97%, highest in the class, with 100% attendance.
Now I am in the manual transmissions and drive-trains. We will cover and repair clutches, 3, 4, 5-speed transmissions, U-joints, CV-joints, transfer cases and differentials.
Probably the most is happening on my Supra project page, so if you like cars, check it out...
supra88.blogspot.com
Now I am in the manual transmissions and drive-trains. We will cover and repair clutches, 3, 4, 5-speed transmissions, U-joints, CV-joints, transfer cases and differentials.
Probably the most is happening on my Supra project page, so if you like cars, check it out...
supra88.blogspot.com
Update: I took down this blog since I had nothing more to publish and I sold the Supra.
Shine
I finally got to watch the movie Shine. It is a very good story based on the real life of a pianist struck by a mental illness, search for love and need to please ever-demanding father. His play make our efforts look small and insignificant. Definetely makes you reach out and want to touch the genius within us.
LTI service shop
Awful experience, nothing is getting done.
Ok, service shop is a class that is supposed to fix students' vehicles, just like a regular automotive shop. The problem is nothing is getting done fast, today all they did was tighten head bolts on my car. In this pace it will take 6 months before that car runs again, if ever. I did some work on the parking lot today, but I got really cold. I wish I had my own garage, or that I could just use a bay in the school, but that is not the case.
On top of that I broke EGR housing, it is going to cost me.
Ok, service shop is a class that is supposed to fix students' vehicles, just like a regular automotive shop. The problem is nothing is getting done fast, today all they did was tighten head bolts on my car. In this pace it will take 6 months before that car runs again, if ever. I did some work on the parking lot today, but I got really cold. I wish I had my own garage, or that I could just use a bay in the school, but that is not the case.
On top of that I broke EGR housing, it is going to cost me.
First class almost over!
Tomorrow is the final of my first class in LTI. I am so happy, ready to move on and learn something new.
So far I got 813 points out of 1000 possible, the highest in the class, leading by 10 points.
Still there is a homework to be graded for 30 points, paper for 50 points and final for 100 points. In any case I got "B" for sure even if I don't do anything else. Of course I want to finish the class as the best, just to keep the edge.
Yeah, I know if there is no other challenge, people are comming up with stupid competitions like that.
So far I got 813 points out of 1000 possible, the highest in the class, leading by 10 points.
Still there is a homework to be graded for 30 points, paper for 50 points and final for 100 points. In any case I got "B" for sure even if I don't do anything else. Of course I want to finish the class as the best, just to keep the edge.
Yeah, I know if there is no other challenge, people are comming up with stupid competitions like that.
Philadelphia
I seems that we gonna move to Philly. Ji's company wants to move resources and she's got offer to move.
I don't know the details yet, I am not sure how is it going to look financially, I hope not bad, because we just bought the condo, so we would loose money on the sale. The move is planned on January, not a good market for real estate.
In any case we want to move, there is sea nearby and Appalatian trail so there should be more attractions than here in Chicago. New York is close, so we would see Tomek more often. LTI has campus in Philly, so I could transfer without much problem. Quebec is also much closer for little foreign trips. I could visit MIT and go to Acadia, N.P. that I planned for so long. We will see, I still would prefer Boston. I guess it is time to send out some resume.
I don't know the details yet, I am not sure how is it going to look financially, I hope not bad, because we just bought the condo, so we would loose money on the sale. The move is planned on January, not a good market for real estate.
In any case we want to move, there is sea nearby and Appalatian trail so there should be more attractions than here in Chicago. New York is close, so we would see Tomek more often. LTI has campus in Philly, so I could transfer without much problem. Quebec is also much closer for little foreign trips. I could visit MIT and go to Acadia, N.P. that I planned for so long. We will see, I still would prefer Boston. I guess it is time to send out some resume.
Last night, after the school, I talked to one of my instructors, Mr. Czuba, for an hour and a half. He is a very nice guy, his interests are mostly automotive electronics, etc. He is more of an engineer than a mechanic, pleasure to talk to. We were talking about my career path and what I should do. It actually helped me a lot since he is the first person that does not see me as, at the most, Jiffy-Lube oil changer like most of other staff does.
Autotronics Blog now open!
To separate dry technical electronic stuff from personal postings I creates a blog exclusively for the electronics.
lucas-autotronix.blogspot.com
lucas-autotronix.blogspot.com
What do you know? Internet works in the most unexpected ways!
My teacher and friend found me in totally unexpected way - thru the Mac Sherlock's program by looking for herself. Since I mentioned her in one of my notes, the program brought her to my web site. Amazing!
My teacher and friend found me in totally unexpected way - thru the Mac Sherlock's program by looking for herself. Since I mentioned her in one of my notes, the program brought her to my web site. Amazing!
I have finished the midterm. I've dropped 16 points of possible 425, that places me as the best student in the class of 27 people. Now, you'd ask, what does it matter, what kind of challenge it is, Mr. Ex Director of Technology?
Well, it pleases me for one. Considering my previous track-record in university this tells me I became a little more studious, more responsive about such things as attendance, homeworks, etc. What's more, if I keep good grades, I promissed myself, after getting the A.A. degree here in LTI, I move on to university to keep on studying. Maybe even one day MIT will accept me.
Well, it pleases me for one. Considering my previous track-record in university this tells me I became a little more studious, more responsive about such things as attendance, homeworks, etc. What's more, if I keep good grades, I promissed myself, after getting the A.A. degree here in LTI, I move on to university to keep on studying. Maybe even one day MIT will accept me.
Christianity and Buddhism
In this short article I will attempt to show that there is a common ground for both of the traditions on their respective highest levels.
To compare Christianity and Buddhism we have to understand clearly the essence and therefore the roots of both.
We will be talking about different religions, it is important to notice a big distinction; Judaism, Christianity, Hinduism are all technically true religions. Buddhism, in its original and true form cannot be classified as religion, but as mere philosophy. It is a philosophy in the very essence of the word; a quest, or pull towards (philo) the knowledge, or understanding (sophy).
Modern day Christianity stems out of much older Judeo-Christian tradition. The Judaic root is based in the teachings of the Old Testament which is heavily influenced by the laws and customs of the Jewish tribes of the era predeceasing the time when the Old Testament was written down from the oral tradition.
With great simplification, Jewish laws, traditions and teachings can be characterized as mostly external in regard to personal self and internal personal insights. The external traditions are simply the laws to be followed. There very little ground of comparison to buddhism here. The internal traditions manifest in Kabbalah teachings of the Judaism, which carried little or no weight into Christianity.
Christianity itself, carrying the external Judaic traditions developed into popular religion which is mostly represented by Protestant faiths (pure belief and laws) and majority of Catholicism (belief, customs and laws).
The tradition based internal insight are represented by a very narrow circle of Catholic and Eastern Orthodox mystics. It is this small group of mystics, and some insignificant fractions of mystic Protestants, that give us the best platform for further comparisons.
Buddhism, on the other hand, stems out of the hinduism, and both of the teachings are based on the internal insight of the individual.
It is therefore not difficult to see that if we want to compare Christianity to Buddhism and to find significant similarities, we will have to understand the internal insight that is the essence of both.
Judeo-Christian mystic experiences as well a Buddhist enlightenment are based on the similar basic principles. A person has to reject the distractions of the every-day world, most often going into seclusion. Person should cleanse the inner body, usually by limiting the intake of drink and food, or fasting. Person has to clean the mind from distractions by meditation, prayer, or contemplation on a single object. Finally, the person has to obtain a state of perfect balance, or union, with the object of the meditation, prayer, or contemplation.
The process of achievement of what eastern tradition call enlightenment (japanese satori), or Judeo-Christian mystic experience (visions and unions with God) are very similar and can be manifested in many ways common across all religions that utilize spiritual insights. Most graphic is in form of mandla that can be found in European church windows sponsored by people after mystic visions, Eastern Orthodox Church paintings, Hindu, east-asian art and Tibetan mandals.
The mandala is such a common reflection of the experience, that based on what was seen, and in what colors, a person can determine the depth of the experience. The subject is too extensive to explain it in-depth in this paper.
There were many great mystics in history of Christianity, Teresa of Avila is one of them, but the most obvious is Jesus himself. Most notably he went through a deep mystic experiences during the time he spent in the desert praying, fasting, being tempted and ultimately uniting with God-father.
Historic Buddha, similarly, fasted extensively in seclusion of the jungle, meditated and achieved enlightenment into his own existence and the ultimate truth about which he spent the rest of his life teaching.
Every religion, and even every individual perceives differently what is the ultimate. There is no point in discussing which one is truth, false, or which is misguided. At certain point of each tradition there is an individual who follows similar steps to achieves higher level of existence. Whether Jesus, believed to be already the son of God, or Buddha, who never claimed divine, and any saint, or Zen master, they all meditated, prayed, or contemplated, fasted and were tempted until the reality as we know it snapped like a broken string and the essence of the ultimate truth filled their lives. Many people compare this phenomena to many paths leading to the same mountain peak.
Finally, one can find similarities between Christianity and Buddhism that are not limited to a narrow circle of mystics. Those similarities are however more superficial and external and therefore secondary from the point of view of a buddhist. Most notably both of the traditions profess non-violence. Christianity has terrible track-record in this regard, but if to adhere to the teaching of Jesus, a person should not kill. Similarly, in Buddhism killing is considered as a source of bad karma, or harmful influence on the world, and therefore should be avoided at any level, including animals, or even inanimate nature, again with mixed results.
To compare Christianity and Buddhism we have to understand clearly the essence and therefore the roots of both.
We will be talking about different religions, it is important to notice a big distinction; Judaism, Christianity, Hinduism are all technically true religions. Buddhism, in its original and true form cannot be classified as religion, but as mere philosophy. It is a philosophy in the very essence of the word; a quest, or pull towards (philo) the knowledge, or understanding (sophy).
Modern day Christianity stems out of much older Judeo-Christian tradition. The Judaic root is based in the teachings of the Old Testament which is heavily influenced by the laws and customs of the Jewish tribes of the era predeceasing the time when the Old Testament was written down from the oral tradition.
With great simplification, Jewish laws, traditions and teachings can be characterized as mostly external in regard to personal self and internal personal insights. The external traditions are simply the laws to be followed. There very little ground of comparison to buddhism here. The internal traditions manifest in Kabbalah teachings of the Judaism, which carried little or no weight into Christianity.
Christianity itself, carrying the external Judaic traditions developed into popular religion which is mostly represented by Protestant faiths (pure belief and laws) and majority of Catholicism (belief, customs and laws).
The tradition based internal insight are represented by a very narrow circle of Catholic and Eastern Orthodox mystics. It is this small group of mystics, and some insignificant fractions of mystic Protestants, that give us the best platform for further comparisons.
Buddhism, on the other hand, stems out of the hinduism, and both of the teachings are based on the internal insight of the individual.
It is therefore not difficult to see that if we want to compare Christianity to Buddhism and to find significant similarities, we will have to understand the internal insight that is the essence of both.
Judeo-Christian mystic experiences as well a Buddhist enlightenment are based on the similar basic principles. A person has to reject the distractions of the every-day world, most often going into seclusion. Person should cleanse the inner body, usually by limiting the intake of drink and food, or fasting. Person has to clean the mind from distractions by meditation, prayer, or contemplation on a single object. Finally, the person has to obtain a state of perfect balance, or union, with the object of the meditation, prayer, or contemplation.
The process of achievement of what eastern tradition call enlightenment (japanese satori), or Judeo-Christian mystic experience (visions and unions with God) are very similar and can be manifested in many ways common across all religions that utilize spiritual insights. Most graphic is in form of mandla that can be found in European church windows sponsored by people after mystic visions, Eastern Orthodox Church paintings, Hindu, east-asian art and Tibetan mandals.
The mandala is such a common reflection of the experience, that based on what was seen, and in what colors, a person can determine the depth of the experience. The subject is too extensive to explain it in-depth in this paper.
There were many great mystics in history of Christianity, Teresa of Avila is one of them, but the most obvious is Jesus himself. Most notably he went through a deep mystic experiences during the time he spent in the desert praying, fasting, being tempted and ultimately uniting with God-father.
Historic Buddha, similarly, fasted extensively in seclusion of the jungle, meditated and achieved enlightenment into his own existence and the ultimate truth about which he spent the rest of his life teaching.
Every religion, and even every individual perceives differently what is the ultimate. There is no point in discussing which one is truth, false, or which is misguided. At certain point of each tradition there is an individual who follows similar steps to achieves higher level of existence. Whether Jesus, believed to be already the son of God, or Buddha, who never claimed divine, and any saint, or Zen master, they all meditated, prayed, or contemplated, fasted and were tempted until the reality as we know it snapped like a broken string and the essence of the ultimate truth filled their lives. Many people compare this phenomena to many paths leading to the same mountain peak.
Finally, one can find similarities between Christianity and Buddhism that are not limited to a narrow circle of mystics. Those similarities are however more superficial and external and therefore secondary from the point of view of a buddhist. Most notably both of the traditions profess non-violence. Christianity has terrible track-record in this regard, but if to adhere to the teaching of Jesus, a person should not kill. Similarly, in Buddhism killing is considered as a source of bad karma, or harmful influence on the world, and therefore should be avoided at any level, including animals, or even inanimate nature, again with mixed results.
Yesterday, I went to my career adviser at LTI, a director of career services. We chatted about job market, an automotive is the second biggest industry after food. Few days back I provided her with my resume. Out of conversation it became clear to me that she cannot help me. I said that in the future I would like to use my computer skills and experience, my management skils and newly aquired automotive technology skills to work for one of the automotive companies in the area. She said she places only entry-level.
Now, my question is: How much job skill does it take to place and school graduate in a Jiffy Lube entry level?
Here goes a chunk on my tuition money ($19K) down the drain.
Now, my question is: How much job skill does it take to place and school graduate in a Jiffy Lube entry level?
Here goes a chunk on my tuition money ($19K) down the drain.
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I ripped my Supra apart. I don't want to sound negative, but it is really dead now. I wander if it will ever run again... it was such an enjoyable ride.
Anyway, in order to fix broken spark-plugs, replace the head gasket and learn a bit, I removed most of the stuff from the engine bay. I call it stuff because at this moment I can name only some of the things I ripped out. I know even less about how they work, even about the things I can name. I am learning.
I run into unexpected problems. I did expect rusted bolts that will be impossible to remove, but I encountered none, instead, the fuel line after opening drained 1/2 gal. and did not want to stop.
Wireing harnes in the second offender. It goes thru the intake manifold which I need to remove and connects to something deep-under that is not reachable.
the fuel fitting
Anyway, in order to fix broken spark-plugs, replace the head gasket and learn a bit, I removed most of the stuff from the engine bay. I call it stuff because at this moment I can name only some of the things I ripped out. I know even less about how they work, even about the things I can name. I am learning.
I run into unexpected problems. I did expect rusted bolts that will be impossible to remove, but I encountered none, instead, the fuel line after opening drained 1/2 gal. and did not want to stop.
Wireing harnes in the second offender. It goes thru the intake manifold which I need to remove and connects to something deep-under that is not reachable.
the fuel fitting
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Decided to take out all spark plugs from my Supra. i knew 3 were frozen.
I took the spark plugs off on cylinders 1, 2, 3, on the fourth the spark plug was cross-threaded. No sweat, heli-coil will fix it. On the cylinder 5 the spark plug snapped. Shut, I thought, I will have to take the head off, what the heck, let's go for number 6. The sixth snapped, too.
To take the head off is a 9 hour job, according to the manual. At $80/hr dealer rate it nears a thousand bucks with parts. That not including machining. Well, the first major fix for me.
The sucky thing is, the car is on the open parking lot in front of my condo. I could try to drive it on the 3 cylinders to school, but with the 152645 firing sequence it would mean I got all cylinders on one side, not good. Maybe I could tow it with the Jeep, we will see in the next couple of days.
I took the spark plugs off on cylinders 1, 2, 3, on the fourth the spark plug was cross-threaded. No sweat, heli-coil will fix it. On the cylinder 5 the spark plug snapped. Shut, I thought, I will have to take the head off, what the heck, let's go for number 6. The sixth snapped, too.
To take the head off is a 9 hour job, according to the manual. At $80/hr dealer rate it nears a thousand bucks with parts. That not including machining. Well, the first major fix for me.
The sucky thing is, the car is on the open parking lot in front of my condo. I could try to drive it on the 3 cylinders to school, but with the 152645 firing sequence it would mean I got all cylinders on one side, not good. Maybe I could tow it with the Jeep, we will see in the next couple of days.
It has been few days since I blogged last, mostly because of the lifestyle. During the day whenever I have energy I try to read about technology, in the evening I am at school for 6 hours, come back it is late and so on.
School, I feel, will teach me what I want, that, of course, with addition to some hands-on extra practice I will have to do on my own. Even if it would come to turning wrenches somewhere for free. I asked Adam, Kinga's mechanic, but I did not get any reply yet.
So what are my outlooks after finishing the school? Well, asistant manager can make up to $45K, Service Manager, foreman, or Service Writer can collect up to $80 large. That would be plenty. I could probably land any one of those jobs, given I study really hard now.
There are ASE certification tests next May being given, I will have to pass 4, the maximum I can take at once. The total of 8 certifications make up for a Master Automotive Technician and a decent pay anywhere I go. And that is really my near-term goal. To be able to go anywhere in the country and find a decent job that would support the family.
School, I feel, will teach me what I want, that, of course, with addition to some hands-on extra practice I will have to do on my own. Even if it would come to turning wrenches somewhere for free. I asked Adam, Kinga's mechanic, but I did not get any reply yet.
So what are my outlooks after finishing the school? Well, asistant manager can make up to $45K, Service Manager, foreman, or Service Writer can collect up to $80 large. That would be plenty. I could probably land any one of those jobs, given I study really hard now.
There are ASE certification tests next May being given, I will have to pass 4, the maximum I can take at once. The total of 8 certifications make up for a Master Automotive Technician and a decent pay anywhere I go. And that is really my near-term goal. To be able to go anywhere in the country and find a decent job that would support the family.
http://www.teammarinesracing.com/
Kansas, KS, NASCAR race track
Wow!
Team Marines car #25, being out of gas (or vapor locks problem) in second position, got hit in the last lap by car in 3rd position. They went into the wall, slammed the rear end to what it looked like total destruction. Not even they survived, they were allowed to finish the race slowly driving smoking from the right and rear end.
Car #21 also slammed the rear end, caught a fire, the new internal extinguisher system took it off almost instantly.
Average speed of the race 113mph, 300 miles race.
Hurray, go Marines!
Kansas, KS, NASCAR race track
Wow!
Team Marines car #25, being out of gas (or vapor locks problem) in second position, got hit in the last lap by car in 3rd position. They went into the wall, slammed the rear end to what it looked like total destruction. Not even they survived, they were allowed to finish the race slowly driving smoking from the right and rear end.
Car #21 also slammed the rear end, caught a fire, the new internal extinguisher system took it off almost instantly.
Average speed of the race 113mph, 300 miles race.
Hurray, go Marines!
First day in Lincoln Tech.
First day of Lincoln Technical Institute school last night. Nothing exciting at all, just a very long 6 hours. I hope to get by those boring intros and actually learn something of any use.
I am reading on my own a lot as well, I hope that will pay off in better results later on.
I am reading on my own a lot as well, I hope that will pay off in better results later on.
Today I replaced the thermostat on my Jeep. The old one was not closing, keeping the water/coolant temperature barely above 100F.
The replacement was not difficult in itself, but the fan shroud, the fan and the belt make the access to the thermostat housing very difficult, especially the bottom bolt.
The replacement was not difficult in itself, but the fan shroud, the fan and the belt make the access to the thermostat housing very difficult, especially the bottom bolt.
I had a nice ride on my bike in the forest nearby my place. There is a continous patch of forest stretching from Touchy to Lake Cook County Line, along the Des Plaines River, many miles. The trail is not paved, ideal for the mountain bike. Occasionally, you have to cross a street and that is the only negative side.
I had a nice ride on my bike in the forest nearby my place. There is a continous patch of forest stretching from Touchy to Lake Cook County Line, along the Des Plaines River, many miles. The bike trail is not paved, ideal for the mountain bike. Occasionally you have to cross a street and that is the only negative side.
I watched the movie "Vertical Limit". Again.
I maybe never will climb K2 - I have neither skills, nor desire, but I miss mountains.
On mountain peaks, after an extreme effort of the climb, you feel truly alive. You find the beauty on the nature, the true scale of the world that surrounds you, and the insignificance of yourself. It is most therapeutic of experiences.
I miss mountains, I hope I will be able to go and climb soon. Maybe I will teach my daughter to appreciate their beauty.
I maybe never will climb K2 - I have neither skills, nor desire, but I miss mountains.
On mountain peaks, after an extreme effort of the climb, you feel truly alive. You find the beauty on the nature, the true scale of the world that surrounds you, and the insignificance of yourself. It is most therapeutic of experiences.
I miss mountains, I hope I will be able to go and climb soon. Maybe I will teach my daughter to appreciate their beauty.
Holly shit!
Kinga Ilgner became an actress as well! Congratulations Kinga!
http://film.wp.pl/www/impreza/2002/cinemalibressecannes/kinga.html
Kinga Ilgner became an actress as well! Congratulations Kinga!
http://film.wp.pl/www/impreza/2002/cinemalibressecannes/kinga.html
My wife was cleaning some boxes today and she found a bunch of my old letters from Poland dating back to my first year here in USA.
Nostalgy overtook me entirely. Since I don't have the contact info to any of my friends. I typed in "Kajetan Konieczny" in Google search and here you go, he is...
Beautiful pictures from my hometown are totally disarming.
http://www.chopok.com.pl/kaj/
People, if you remember: Kalimos, Kalima, Lukasz Grzeszkowiak, or anyone else similar, write to me! I still have dear memories of those years we spent together.
I wrote an email to Kajtek, we will see.
Nostalgy overtook me entirely. Since I don't have the contact info to any of my friends. I typed in "Kajetan Konieczny" in Google search and here you go, he is...
Beautiful pictures from my hometown are totally disarming.
http://www.chopok.com.pl/kaj/
People, if you remember: Kalimos, Kalima, Lukasz Grzeszkowiak, or anyone else similar, write to me! I still have dear memories of those years we spent together.
I wrote an email to Kajtek, we will see.
We do not see what is, we imagine what we see based on our life memories triggered by visiual input.
I have no idea why Ji wakes me up just to change the diaper since she is up anyway to feed Lili, I guess, it is to have a company in the misery of getting up at 2 AM. No fun to get my butt off the bed.
It is really rewarding however, Liliann was such a happy baby this time, she was patient, attentive and really happy. I played with her for a little while and she really smiled looking at me and hearing daddy's voice. Such a joy! Little moments of life.
It is really rewarding however, Liliann was such a happy baby this time, she was patient, attentive and really happy. I played with her for a little while and she really smiled looking at me and hearing daddy's voice. Such a joy! Little moments of life.
We watched "i am sam - love is all you need". Beautiful movie. So much we all can learn from it. Watch it is you have not seen it yet.
It is so interesting to see how people react to the fact that I signed up for automotive technology school. Those who know that I am a really good software engineer think that it is unfortunate. How can you go from $80K director of technology to a mechanic.
Well, the truth is, I know it already, that I will have to learn so much more to be a good mechanic than I ever did to become the programmer.
Yes, I signed up for 15 month program at Lincoln Technical Institute. School will be 4 days a week 5-11 PM, a lot of hands-on training.
Most of all, I hope, eventually, I will be able to open my own garage. Away from the rotten world of the corporations, away from the greedy MBAs, cut-throat CTOs and heartless CEOs.
I don't need to compete, suck-up, impress. I just need to do my job well and I will be able to support my family.
All the 7:30AM - 9-10PM masohism I have done for ADEXS were pointless, worthless waste of time, and most of all it hurt the people that worked for me.
I am excited like I have not been for a very long time!
It is so interesting to see how people react to the fact that I signed up for automotive technology school. Those who know that I am a really good software engineer think that it is unfortunate. How can you go from $80K director of technology to a mechanic.
Well, the truth is, I know it already, that I will have to learn so much more to be a good mechanic than I ever did to become the programmer.
Yes, I signed up for 15 month program at Lincoln Technical Institute. School will be 4 days a week 5-11 PM, a lot of hands-on training.
Most of all, I hope, eventually, I will be able to open my own garage. Away from the rotten world of the corporations, away from the greedy MBAs, cut-throat CTOs and heartless CEOs.
I don't need to compete, suck-up, impress. I just need to do my job well and I will be able to support my family.
All the 7:30AM - 9-10PM masohism I have done for ADEXS were pointless, worthless waste of time, and most of all it hurt the people that worked for me.
I am excited like I have not been for a very long time!
It took us whole day at the dealership, but we finally got the car for Ji's mother. We got a silver 2003 Golf GLS. I like the quality of the finish better than the Toyota Corolla.
I am suprised, actually it drives pretty well for such an underpowered car (115 hp). I wanted a TDi version but there is no way to get it and they are pricer. Nice features include quality finish, CD/stereo, sun roof, alloy wheels, ABS, tinted glass and more.
I am suprised, actually it drives pretty well for such an underpowered car (115 hp). I wanted a TDi version but there is no way to get it and they are pricer. Nice features include quality finish, CD/stereo, sun roof, alloy wheels, ABS, tinted glass and more.
For last few days we have been shopping for a new car for Ji's mother:
Options: Honda Civic, Toyota Corolla, VW Golf/Jetta
Today's chat:
Uki: so how the 115 HP engine (Golf) will feel when I get into the car switching from 200hp Supra, or 195 HP Jeep?
Tomek: dead, I'm afraid
Well, right on!
Options: Honda Civic, Toyota Corolla, VW Golf/Jetta
Today's chat:
Uki: so how the 115 HP engine (Golf) will feel when I get into the car switching from 200hp Supra, or 195 HP Jeep?
Tomek: dead, I'm afraid
Well, right on!
Ann, how is it that you can bring absolutely EVERYTHING down to sex division, and to the fact that poor women are so oppressed by evil men?
Why is it so hard to accept the fact that people in USA do not care that much about soccer? People will momentarily look at the women soccer, maybe say 'cool' and then switch the channel to baseball, basketball, or football. Opposite is true in Europe, or Latin America, where people don't care much about American sports.
Now, having said that, it think it is time for introspection. I have know you for couple of years now. I don't know if you were raped, or abused, or where the seed of your problem with men-gender originates. You write countless notes about that hatred, if it is as simple as bad luck with men, there is a simple cure, avoid men you meet in the bars, drinking type, the type that hangs out in the streets, trains after midnight.
There are many men who care, who are polite, understanding, just and virtuous. They do not spend nights in the bars, or train stops at 2 AM. Look elsewhere for once.
Remember, there are millions of trashy women that counter-balance every bad man you have ever met. Mean, blood and money sucking women, we all had a dose of that... I don't believe either gender is better, we both know they are a little different, but not better, or superior (I know you might argue that).
You know I always wished you well and still do.
http://www.miserychick.net/
Why is it so hard to accept the fact that people in USA do not care that much about soccer? People will momentarily look at the women soccer, maybe say 'cool' and then switch the channel to baseball, basketball, or football. Opposite is true in Europe, or Latin America, where people don't care much about American sports.
Now, having said that, it think it is time for introspection. I have know you for couple of years now. I don't know if you were raped, or abused, or where the seed of your problem with men-gender originates. You write countless notes about that hatred, if it is as simple as bad luck with men, there is a simple cure, avoid men you meet in the bars, drinking type, the type that hangs out in the streets, trains after midnight.
There are many men who care, who are polite, understanding, just and virtuous. They do not spend nights in the bars, or train stops at 2 AM. Look elsewhere for once.
Remember, there are millions of trashy women that counter-balance every bad man you have ever met. Mean, blood and money sucking women, we all had a dose of that... I don't believe either gender is better, we both know they are a little different, but not better, or superior (I know you might argue that).
You know I always wished you well and still do.
http://www.miserychick.net/
Lili's first days
We spend whole days dedicated to Lili; our life revolves around her now. We sleep a lot, eat, watch TV, and occasionally read a book. Then there are about 10-12 diapers a day, breastfeeding every 3 hours, every time lasting 30-45 minutes, so really every two hours.
Lili does not cry much now. We figured out her needs and are able to anticipate them, so when she starts making noises, Ji feeds her a little, then I change her diaper if needed (mostly yes), and then I feed her more. Sometimes, she falls asleep, and sometimes, we play together for a few hours.
When Lili is content, she just looks around the room, observing everything couriously, her dark-gray eyes wide open. I play with ther hands and feet, or massage her, to get the blood flowing.
Lili has a very strong grasp. I can almost lift her up by her holding on to my fingers. She can kick as well; she can move or lift her whole body with a good kick. Today, we were dancing a little to my whistling. I was supporting her underarms, and she was straightening her legs—a good exercise for her.
Life goes on slowly, but it is joyous.
Family and friends think that they should not visit us, or that we need rest and privacy. Reality is that sucks and that we would welcome some diversion, especially that Ji is not in shape to travel yet.
We plan to go to Kentucky for a little while, a mountain countryside in the fall should do as well, it is very pictoresque there.
Ji's mother had a hissy-fit another day and was yelling at Ji.
Lili does not cry much now. We figured out her needs and are able to anticipate them, so when she starts making noises, Ji feeds her a little, then I change her diaper if needed (mostly yes), and then I feed her more. Sometimes, she falls asleep, and sometimes, we play together for a few hours.
When Lili is content, she just looks around the room, observing everything couriously, her dark-gray eyes wide open. I play with ther hands and feet, or massage her, to get the blood flowing.
Lili has a very strong grasp. I can almost lift her up by her holding on to my fingers. She can kick as well; she can move or lift her whole body with a good kick. Today, we were dancing a little to my whistling. I was supporting her underarms, and she was straightening her legs—a good exercise for her.
Life goes on slowly, but it is joyous.
Family and friends think that they should not visit us, or that we need rest and privacy. Reality is that sucks and that we would welcome some diversion, especially that Ji is not in shape to travel yet.
We plan to go to Kentucky for a little while, a mountain countryside in the fall should do as well, it is very pictoresque there.
Ji's mother had a hissy-fit another day and was yelling at Ji.
The issue was that Ji does not follow her advices. This morning, Ji pulled up some Korean websites about postpartum mother care and showed her that the traditional seaweed soups, et ceterum, are no longer recommended by Koearn doctors and are a thing of the past. Post-Korean war, when food was scarce, the soup of weeds, beef bones, and white rice was a treat, but now it only sticks up the kitchen and is, to say the least, poor nutrition for a young, breastfeeding mother.
I got frustrated with Ji's mother after seeing the pillows around the baby's face. I told her not to put them there previously, as they may cause the baby to fall into the SID shock.
Old habits die hard.
I got frustrated with Ji's mother after seeing the pillows around the baby's face. I told her not to put them there previously, as they may cause the baby to fall into the SID shock.
Old habits die hard.
Around midnight I knew that Ji will have to have a ceasarian section. Her cervix did not dialiate more than 6.5 cm in several hours. Because the hospital was full of deliveries and Ji was rather stable and painless, we had to wait for our turn.
She was douzing off, I got a chair. Sucks! The really don't give up a shit about daddies there, for me it was a second night restless. Cold and tired.
Finally out turn came, Ji in good shape, no pain, not too stressed.
After they prep her for the operation, I got invited to the room. I had time to change over into scrubs, with hat, mask, and booties. There was a screen running over Ji's chest so she cannot see the surgery, I could see it all.
I really do not recommend anybody seeing a c-section, or any other major surgery (Ceasarian section is a common procedure, but it is considered a major surgery).
I have seen a lot of in my life, cleaning of the killed pig, deer, skinning of the rabbit, countless killings of the chicken, gutting the fish, all pretty grossing, blood never upset me too much. This was the worst! On one side there was she covered with a plastic sheet, yellow skin color, not unlike a pork-halfs. Her belly cut horizontally what seemed like hip-to-hip, spread out with a clamps. The got a baby by pushing from the top down.
At the same time Ji is awake, trying to grasp for air like a fish out of water and not getting any. Panicing. Both I and the anesteziologist (who was really good man) calming her and encouraging to relax breathing.
After the baby was out, everything was like a caleidescope, so I kind of lost perspective. I could see that baby is good and healthy instantly, she just looked strong. They clean her lightly and put ther on the scale, I took the pictures, but at the same time I was going back to Ji to confort her, she was relaxing now a little more. In the midtime they were cleaning her, having her uterus (?), totally out of the belly, like deflated valley ball bladder.
They were cleaning everything with the suction (looked like they are vaccum cleaning) and sawing her up with the stiches inside. After that two nurses counted the instruments, which took a while. Doctors rinced her belly one more time after which one was holding the skin todether and another put in 13 metal staples. The deal was over.
Within an hour Ji got to hold the baby in the recovery room and after that she was moved upstairs to sleep, I also went home to sleep as I was falling off my feet. I fell asleep 4 time driving home, but I made it, slep until 5 PM!
Ji slept whole day too, with the break for baby feeding. We spent the evening quietly enjoying that all worked out well. The baby was absolutely beatiful, nobody could ask for more!
She was douzing off, I got a chair. Sucks! The really don't give up a shit about daddies there, for me it was a second night restless. Cold and tired.
Finally out turn came, Ji in good shape, no pain, not too stressed.
After they prep her for the operation, I got invited to the room. I had time to change over into scrubs, with hat, mask, and booties. There was a screen running over Ji's chest so she cannot see the surgery, I could see it all.
I really do not recommend anybody seeing a c-section, or any other major surgery (Ceasarian section is a common procedure, but it is considered a major surgery).
I have seen a lot of in my life, cleaning of the killed pig, deer, skinning of the rabbit, countless killings of the chicken, gutting the fish, all pretty grossing, blood never upset me too much. This was the worst! On one side there was she covered with a plastic sheet, yellow skin color, not unlike a pork-halfs. Her belly cut horizontally what seemed like hip-to-hip, spread out with a clamps. The got a baby by pushing from the top down.
At the same time Ji is awake, trying to grasp for air like a fish out of water and not getting any. Panicing. Both I and the anesteziologist (who was really good man) calming her and encouraging to relax breathing.
After the baby was out, everything was like a caleidescope, so I kind of lost perspective. I could see that baby is good and healthy instantly, she just looked strong. They clean her lightly and put ther on the scale, I took the pictures, but at the same time I was going back to Ji to confort her, she was relaxing now a little more. In the midtime they were cleaning her, having her uterus (?), totally out of the belly, like deflated valley ball bladder.
They were cleaning everything with the suction (looked like they are vaccum cleaning) and sawing her up with the stiches inside. After that two nurses counted the instruments, which took a while. Doctors rinced her belly one more time after which one was holding the skin todether and another put in 13 metal staples. The deal was over.
Within an hour Ji got to hold the baby in the recovery room and after that she was moved upstairs to sleep, I also went home to sleep as I was falling off my feet. I fell asleep 4 time driving home, but I made it, slep until 5 PM!
Ji slept whole day too, with the break for baby feeding. We spent the evening quietly enjoying that all worked out well. The baby was absolutely beatiful, nobody could ask for more!
Wednesday September 3, 2003
The night was horrific, Ji was crying outloud every 6 minutes, neither of us got much sleep. We went to the hospital again at 1100. At about 1500 she decided to take epidural, after that she bacame quite comfortable. The nurse was giving adding a drug to her IV to increase contractions, they went from 2 mg/hr. to 24 mg/hr. At 2200 she got one very long 4-to-5 minute contraction. The normal contractions last from 60 to 90 seconds. When there is a contraction, since baby head is pointing down, the baby is being squizzed and her pulse is dropping from 130s to 80s. It is OK for a moment but not too long. Suddenly 4 doctors rushed to the room, gave Ji a shot to relax muscles. The side effect of the drug is that makes mother's heart run fast. So here is Ji with 4 doctors running around, her heart racing, she got the skeletal muscles' spasms, so she is shaking on the bed, stressed out and awake, not fun. The calmed down everything eventually.
The night was horrific, Ji was crying outloud every 6 minutes, neither of us got much sleep. We went to the hospital again at 1100. At about 1500 she decided to take epidural, after that she bacame quite comfortable. The nurse was giving adding a drug to her IV to increase contractions, they went from 2 mg/hr. to 24 mg/hr. At 2200 she got one very long 4-to-5 minute contraction. The normal contractions last from 60 to 90 seconds. When there is a contraction, since baby head is pointing down, the baby is being squizzed and her pulse is dropping from 130s to 80s. It is OK for a moment but not too long. Suddenly 4 doctors rushed to the room, gave Ji a shot to relax muscles. The side effect of the drug is that makes mother's heart run fast. So here is Ji with 4 doctors running around, her heart racing, she got the skeletal muscles' spasms, so she is shaking on the bed, stressed out and awake, not fun. The calmed down everything eventually.
We wasted a day in the hospital just to get a boot and to be told to come back either with the baby on hand, when the waters break, or when she is hurting so bad that she cannot talk.
So much for the contractions every 6 minutes since late morning today.
So much for the contractions every 6 minutes since late morning today.
Labor Day came and is gone and no sight of the baby.
I spent hours watching motorcycle buildups on the Discover channel. Also reading about Chevy small block re-building.
I spent hours watching motorcycle buildups on the Discover channel. Also reading about Chevy small block re-building.
We got up in the early morning after a night of constant wake-ups. The baby is really pushing down now so she has to go pee frequently. There were also the first signs of labor coming up. Cramps and blood-spots, but it could be actual days before baby is out. Hopefully soon. Going shopping for few more items to "babies'r us". I had to throw away the handled down crib. She wanted it washed, so I did, what we did not know it was made of light-weight paper that came apart in water.
The day is almost out and baby is not even thinking about coming out. I have read thru couple of chapters of "What To Expect - The First Year".
Ji has been very calm today, no stress showing. Her belly, about 42-43 inches, did not prevent her from spending of three hours in the hair saloon getting her hair nice and curly. Mama is looking good! She has been asleep for a while now.
Time to go sleep and rest. Maybe tomorrow, the Labor Day, will live up to its name.
Ji has been very calm today, no stress showing. Her belly, about 42-43 inches, did not prevent her from spending of three hours in the hair saloon getting her hair nice and curly. Mama is looking good! She has been asleep for a while now.
Time to go sleep and rest. Maybe tomorrow, the Labor Day, will live up to its name.
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Quid dedicatum poscit Apollinem
What is a poet asking Apollo,
What is he praying for, raising fresh wine in the Actiaca victory temple?
Oh, not for the riches of Sardinia.
He does not want the flocks of Calabriae,
not ivory, or grains from the banks of Liris.
Neither the gold coins.
Campaniae vines
Let to the fortune's lucky farmer's care.
From the golden vase Syrian rug merchant
Drinks now,
for he must be gods' favorite
Crossing the seas thousandfold with no harm.
I, dear Apollo, take light olive
Let me be happy with the little I have
Love,
good health and a clear mind that will not fail
And when old age comes, let it be gentle
And full of these songs...
Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65 - 8 b.c.e.
(translation and interpretation Uki D. Lucas)
Quid dedicatum poscit Apollinem
vates? quid orat de patera novum
fundens liquorem? non opimae
Sardiniae segetes feracis,
vates? quid orat de patera novum
fundens liquorem? non opimae
Sardiniae segetes feracis,
non aestuosae grata Calabriae
armenta, non aurum aut ebur Indicum,
non rura, quae Liris quieta
mordet aqua taciturnus amnis.
premant Calenam falce quibus dedit
fortuna vitem, dives ut aureis
mercator exsiccet culillis
vina Syra reparata merce,
dis carus ipsis, quippe ter et quater
anno revisens aequor Atlanticum
inpune. me pascunt olivae,
me cichorea levesque malvae.
frui paratis et valido mihi,
Latoe, dones et precor integra
cum mente nec turpem senectam
degere nec cithara carentem.
Thursday, August 28, 2003 23:16
One day, back in high school in Poland, my Polish language teacher, Mrs. Magda Tomalak, told me that people like me never graduate from universities. So far she has been right. Back then, however, I did not know it was because of the teachers that taught like her.
At this point I would like to pay my respect to my another teacher from Poland, Mrs. Maria Szura, an elementary school biology teacher and to my East-Asian Anthropology teacher, Dr. Janice Turner-Sacherer, from University of Maryland. Both shared a passion for their respective fields and for the teaching. Both inspired me for life. I only hope to see each one again, although I would be ashamed since I did not amount to accomplish much in my life, not a least by our society standards.
Sunday, August 24, 2003 08:36
Phaedrus, a ghost of Robert M. Pirsing's character in the book "Zen and the Motorcycle Maintenance", chapter nineteen, considers the Quality as the separate from either subjective and objective, and as the third identity, an event.
What he fails to notice is that a subjective opinion of an individual, the personal view, frequently overlaps with those of other people, especially in the same culture, where the sets of values are being uniformly indoctrinated. That common sense of the quality expressed by sufficient many becomes the objective quality.
The objective quality is in fact the result of the indoctrination and to a certain point of the internal "wiring" of our senses. Because of that, it can be said that it represents the classical mindset as the author calls it. If, somehow, it would be possible to subtract all the objective sense of the quality, what would be left will be the subjective sense of what he calls romantic mind. My intuition tells me there is not much of it. Only in the few moments of true self-soul-searching we find those minute differences, and express them in some form of abstract painting, sculpture or a poem that nobody else can understand, or, more often, in a scream, or roar, that comes out of our chest when we reached the metaphoric peak of the mountain we have been climbing.
One day, back in high school in Poland, my Polish language teacher, Mrs. Magda Tomalak, told me that people like me never graduate from universities. So far she has been right. Back then, however, I did not know it was because of the teachers that taught like her.
At this point I would like to pay my respect to my another teacher from Poland, Mrs. Maria Szura, an elementary school biology teacher and to my East-Asian Anthropology teacher, Dr. Janice Turner-Sacherer, from University of Maryland. Both shared a passion for their respective fields and for the teaching. Both inspired me for life. I only hope to see each one again, although I would be ashamed since I did not amount to accomplish much in my life, not a least by our society standards.
Sunday, August 24, 2003 08:36
Phaedrus, a ghost of Robert M. Pirsing's character in the book "Zen and the Motorcycle Maintenance", chapter nineteen, considers the Quality as the separate from either subjective and objective, and as the third identity, an event.
What he fails to notice is that a subjective opinion of an individual, the personal view, frequently overlaps with those of other people, especially in the same culture, where the sets of values are being uniformly indoctrinated. That common sense of the quality expressed by sufficient many becomes the objective quality.
The objective quality is in fact the result of the indoctrination and to a certain point of the internal "wiring" of our senses. Because of that, it can be said that it represents the classical mindset as the author calls it. If, somehow, it would be possible to subtract all the objective sense of the quality, what would be left will be the subjective sense of what he calls romantic mind. My intuition tells me there is not much of it. Only in the few moments of true self-soul-searching we find those minute differences, and express them in some form of abstract painting, sculpture or a poem that nobody else can understand, or, more often, in a scream, or roar, that comes out of our chest when we reached the metaphoric peak of the mountain we have been climbing.
I did not have the Internet until yesterday.
SBC is really an unorganized and divided company. None of the departaments has any pride in their work and they constantly push you off to another person. Their computer system is equivalent, too. They may have several addresses of yours as well as the names of your business. If you run into any problems be prepared to hear long menu options after which, you might assume that you have selected the right departament, but invariably you you are going to be transwered once, or twice, or disconnected without anybody calling you back.
It took from August 1 to August 28 to move my existing Internet connection, of that, it took only one day to actually phisically change the switch, the rest was procrastination.
SBC is really an unorganized and divided company. None of the departaments has any pride in their work and they constantly push you off to another person. Their computer system is equivalent, too. They may have several addresses of yours as well as the names of your business. If you run into any problems be prepared to hear long menu options after which, you might assume that you have selected the right departament, but invariably you you are going to be transwered once, or twice, or disconnected without anybody calling you back.
It took from August 1 to August 28 to move my existing Internet connection, of that, it took only one day to actually phisically change the switch, the rest was procrastination.
I watched a program on Christina Aquilera today.
It is mind-boggling how sickly puritan the United States still is, how far behind Europe they are. I cannot even believe that they actually were pulling a plug on her videos, when she was all-the-rage elsewhere in the world.
Why is it that every teen boy browses porn pictures at any occasion and that you would be hard pressed to find a virgin high-school graduate, yet United States are so in denial of sex?
Everybody normal has sex and enjoys sex, if we humans were not, we would die-out long time ago. Admit it, get over it, live with it.
Don't worry so much about our youth, they will be better off with healthy approach to live than developing conplexes and denials.
Does not matter how much guilt you impress upon people, they will feel what all of us do feel and they will only live in the state of confusion.
You want teen pregnancy? Keep your daughter in the dark, she will find all she needed to know after she gets pregnant.
People wake up, dark ages ended a while ago in Europe will it take five hundred years for USA to catch up?
I have a deep respect for the music of both Madonna and Christina, I appreciate their statements as well.
It is mind-boggling how sickly puritan the United States still is, how far behind Europe they are. I cannot even believe that they actually were pulling a plug on her videos, when she was all-the-rage elsewhere in the world.
Why is it that every teen boy browses porn pictures at any occasion and that you would be hard pressed to find a virgin high-school graduate, yet United States are so in denial of sex?
Everybody normal has sex and enjoys sex, if we humans were not, we would die-out long time ago. Admit it, get over it, live with it.
Don't worry so much about our youth, they will be better off with healthy approach to live than developing conplexes and denials.
Does not matter how much guilt you impress upon people, they will feel what all of us do feel and they will only live in the state of confusion.
You want teen pregnancy? Keep your daughter in the dark, she will find all she needed to know after she gets pregnant.
People wake up, dark ages ended a while ago in Europe will it take five hundred years for USA to catch up?
I have a deep respect for the music of both Madonna and Christina, I appreciate their statements as well.
Study, teaching and practice of buddhism
I have decided to openly pursue the study, teaching, and practice of buddhism.
It is of a little secret that I have been attracted to buddhism for at least the last ten years, but there were many things I had to get right in my mind, and in my life, to come to this stage of affairs.
Let me point out few major stepping stones without which it is meaningless to even talk about a daily practice. Those stepping stones will lead one to what can be called a home temple where one can fully understand the buddhist way to enlightement. Anyone is welcome, but all must make the effort.
1) The Way of Life.
Buddhism was originally meant to be, and shall be, a philosophy of life, a way to the enlightement, not a religion.
2) The Faith vs. The Understanding.
There shall not be any friction between practicing of buddhism and believing in any other religion as to the its faith. The buddhism is not about believing, but about understanding, or perceiving. That understanding comes on the logical, and the intuitive (a non-dualistic), levels. The choice of the religion to follow is one's personal and should be dictated by the conciousness. There are, however, harmful faiths that conceal behind traditions and religions. One should study much and develop a broad perspective.
3) Worldly Attachments.
It is contrary to the understanding of the buddhism to maintain celibacy, to renounce the World, or any such extremes. It is essential to embrace the World as it is and as the naturalists say it "to thread lightly". It is essential to understand one's own attachments and their effects. However, it is appropriate to question and abandon the attachments that are perceived as ill-natured. Buddhism is a middle path.
4) Karma.
The core of the buddhism is a full awarness of the law of causation. One smallest event causes ten thousand things to happen. Any affects all. One shall be always aware of that karmic law. At the same time one shall not fall into traps of logical dualism.
5) Good and bad.
There are neither good nor bad actions in buddhism, there is only suchness of those actions. Any action can cause positive and negative, or both, consequent effects, yet conciously bad actions leave their karmic mark and intuitively shall be avoided. It will be a sign of a good practice when good-natured actions will intuitively replace any ill ones.
6) Rules.
There shall be no commandmants, precepts, nor rules in buddhism. All teachings shall be taken as suggestions for one to meditate on and come to their full understanding. The follower of the buddhism shall not ignore the ancient teachings and study them in-depth, however one shall not follow mindlessly, nor literally, any of such teachings.
7) Compassion.
One shall develop a compassionate approach to the World as one cannot exist without the World. Onyone with this understanding of buddhism should propagate it thru the World in a bodhisattva fashion, such compassion shall be an agent and a messenger of the buddhism.
8) Daily practice.
The practice of the buddhism shall be one's daily life, not a mere visit to the temple, few minutes of a chant, yoga practice, sitting meditation, nor retreat in the nature. Those various practices may be integrated into daily buddhism, but if practiced in mindless vacum can be also harmful. One shall choose daily tasks to reflect their buddhist mind.
9) Training.
Mind does not exist without body and they are both same on one level. One shall train their minds as much as their bodies to achieve a radiant and healthy results. One shall follow the study, the works, the exercise and the appropriate diet.
10) Masters.
One shall take time to learn from old masters that came before, improve upon, respect their efforts and support their causes.
11) Worship.
No buddhist shall be considered a saint, nor be worshipped as such. The creations of the mind and symbols shall be taken as just such. Traditions and art shall be respected, developed, and protected for the future generations.
12) Home Temple.
All past teachings should be preserved and attempt shall be made to propagate many of them for all to come. It is a natural step for one to eventually retire from the daily life and dedicate one's time to the study, the practice, and the teaching at the home temple. Because the home temple provides a peacefull environment, more suitable for the study and the colaboration, it is recommended to support one, and eventually spend time in the home temple passing on the knowledge to the next generations.
It is of a little secret that I have been attracted to buddhism for at least the last ten years, but there were many things I had to get right in my mind, and in my life, to come to this stage of affairs.
Let me point out few major stepping stones without which it is meaningless to even talk about a daily practice. Those stepping stones will lead one to what can be called a home temple where one can fully understand the buddhist way to enlightement. Anyone is welcome, but all must make the effort.
1) The Way of Life.
Buddhism was originally meant to be, and shall be, a philosophy of life, a way to the enlightement, not a religion.
2) The Faith vs. The Understanding.
There shall not be any friction between practicing of buddhism and believing in any other religion as to the its faith. The buddhism is not about believing, but about understanding, or perceiving. That understanding comes on the logical, and the intuitive (a non-dualistic), levels. The choice of the religion to follow is one's personal and should be dictated by the conciousness. There are, however, harmful faiths that conceal behind traditions and religions. One should study much and develop a broad perspective.
3) Worldly Attachments.
It is contrary to the understanding of the buddhism to maintain celibacy, to renounce the World, or any such extremes. It is essential to embrace the World as it is and as the naturalists say it "to thread lightly". It is essential to understand one's own attachments and their effects. However, it is appropriate to question and abandon the attachments that are perceived as ill-natured. Buddhism is a middle path.
4) Karma.
The core of the buddhism is a full awarness of the law of causation. One smallest event causes ten thousand things to happen. Any affects all. One shall be always aware of that karmic law. At the same time one shall not fall into traps of logical dualism.
5) Good and bad.
There are neither good nor bad actions in buddhism, there is only suchness of those actions. Any action can cause positive and negative, or both, consequent effects, yet conciously bad actions leave their karmic mark and intuitively shall be avoided. It will be a sign of a good practice when good-natured actions will intuitively replace any ill ones.
6) Rules.
There shall be no commandmants, precepts, nor rules in buddhism. All teachings shall be taken as suggestions for one to meditate on and come to their full understanding. The follower of the buddhism shall not ignore the ancient teachings and study them in-depth, however one shall not follow mindlessly, nor literally, any of such teachings.
7) Compassion.
One shall develop a compassionate approach to the World as one cannot exist without the World. Onyone with this understanding of buddhism should propagate it thru the World in a bodhisattva fashion, such compassion shall be an agent and a messenger of the buddhism.
8) Daily practice.
The practice of the buddhism shall be one's daily life, not a mere visit to the temple, few minutes of a chant, yoga practice, sitting meditation, nor retreat in the nature. Those various practices may be integrated into daily buddhism, but if practiced in mindless vacum can be also harmful. One shall choose daily tasks to reflect their buddhist mind.
9) Training.
Mind does not exist without body and they are both same on one level. One shall train their minds as much as their bodies to achieve a radiant and healthy results. One shall follow the study, the works, the exercise and the appropriate diet.
10) Masters.
One shall take time to learn from old masters that came before, improve upon, respect their efforts and support their causes.
11) Worship.
No buddhist shall be considered a saint, nor be worshipped as such. The creations of the mind and symbols shall be taken as just such. Traditions and art shall be respected, developed, and protected for the future generations.
12) Home Temple.
All past teachings should be preserved and attempt shall be made to propagate many of them for all to come. It is a natural step for one to eventually retire from the daily life and dedicate one's time to the study, the practice, and the teaching at the home temple. Because the home temple provides a peacefull environment, more suitable for the study and the colaboration, it is recommended to support one, and eventually spend time in the home temple passing on the knowledge to the next generations.
Anybody looking for my blog on Google must have been a really presistent searcher, I am listed only on the page 5 of the results. Thank you for that effort!
I am back to the Internet World, SBC finally got their act together after a way too long for a "small business account" that I am holding.
I am resolved to read and study even more than I have ever done and write more. As I have always been a nerd, I got only one thing to say, "you have seen nothing yet, baby".
I am resolved to read and study even more than I have ever done and write more. As I have always been a nerd, I got only one thing to say, "you have seen nothing yet, baby".
I have read today that the first year of the baby's life is very stressful on the parents.
Stress, depression, sleep depravation.
Dipers and feeding every 2 hours of the night, etc...
Since seems like the bulk of the effort will be falling up on me, I am preparing for the effort. I am entirely not sure what to think about the idea of stay-at-home dad. Will we eventually send off the baby to the daycare, yes, probably.
I am sure I want to help as much as I can for the first 2 months to let my wife re-bounce back to good health and to rest. We will see what to do later.
I hope I will experience the baby carrying as a good practice for myself. I hope I will grow mentaly and spiritually.
Remember the buddhist marathon monks of the Mount Hiei raising up after midnight and running 80 km daily.
Stress, depression, sleep depravation.
Dipers and feeding every 2 hours of the night, etc...
Since seems like the bulk of the effort will be falling up on me, I am preparing for the effort. I am entirely not sure what to think about the idea of stay-at-home dad. Will we eventually send off the baby to the daycare, yes, probably.
I am sure I want to help as much as I can for the first 2 months to let my wife re-bounce back to good health and to rest. We will see what to do later.
I hope I will experience the baby carrying as a good practice for myself. I hope I will grow mentaly and spiritually.
Remember the buddhist marathon monks of the Mount Hiei raising up after midnight and running 80 km daily.
The friend of a long time ago called me yesterday. It is so nice to talk to somebody familiar. It has been a real long time.
While in the circle of friends... another friend seems to be depressed... problems, problems.
While in the circle of friends... another friend seems to be depressed... problems, problems.
I am in the public library in Evanston updating my blog and checking the eMails.
SBC disconnected my service couple of days ago, but not connected the new one, they promise they will have it up by the 15th (one more week).
Since I have a small business account, I asked the rep how would she conduct her business if she had her Internet turned-off for 2 weeks.
They suck!
SBC disconnected my service couple of days ago, but not connected the new one, they promise they will have it up by the 15th (one more week).
Since I have a small business account, I asked the rep how would she conduct her business if she had her Internet turned-off for 2 weeks.
They suck!
I read a medical add today...
"Women weighing over 155 pounds were at higher risk of pregnancy when taking birth control pills containing less than 35 mcg of estrogen.
The average weight of women aged 20 years and older examined in United States is 152 pounds."
At the height of 5 feet, 10 inches I weigh 155 pounds, just like an average woman.
Pathetic me! Gotta find me a bag of chips somewhere...
"Women weighing over 155 pounds were at higher risk of pregnancy when taking birth control pills containing less than 35 mcg of estrogen.
The average weight of women aged 20 years and older examined in United States is 152 pounds."
At the height of 5 feet, 10 inches I weigh 155 pounds, just like an average woman.
Pathetic me! Gotta find me a bag of chips somewhere...
For a past few weeks I was trying to motivate my younger siblings a bit.
It is pathetic to see how uninterested they are in their own future, how little self-esteem they have. They don't know yet that they don't have to compete with their peers, or be more intelligent than any of them. All that matters that they constantly work on their own interests and cultivate them early. If they find this out in college, it may be too late.
Both of them have a lot of potential, both are intelligent enough. My brother has a strong advantage of having a wonderful character and good work ethic.
Neither had any direction in their lives.
It brings back my previous note from February 06, 2002 (last paragraph).
It is pathetic to see how uninterested they are in their own future, how little self-esteem they have. They don't know yet that they don't have to compete with their peers, or be more intelligent than any of them. All that matters that they constantly work on their own interests and cultivate them early. If they find this out in college, it may be too late.
Both of them have a lot of potential, both are intelligent enough. My brother has a strong advantage of having a wonderful character and good work ethic.
Neither had any direction in their lives.
It brings back my previous note from February 06, 2002 (last paragraph).
PSEUDOTUMOR CEREBRI
Typically occures in (19 per 100,000) women 20 - 40 years old, mostly obese (80%).
Symptoms:
- swollen optic discs (normally a small, creamy, circle with sharp edges agaist red background)
- severe headaches, especially when bending/compressing the body
- vomiting, double vision, ringing in the eyes, and vertigo
- cerebrospinal fluid pressure above normal 7 - 20 cm
- normal reading (negative) in CT scan
Causes:
Cerebrospinal fluid pressure on the nerves, including optic causing inflamation. Connection with female hormones and overweight.
Prevention:
Keeping the weight and cardio-vascular system healthy by proper exercise and healthy diet.
Typically occures in (19 per 100,000) women 20 - 40 years old, mostly obese (80%).
Symptoms:
- swollen optic discs (normally a small, creamy, circle with sharp edges agaist red background)
- severe headaches, especially when bending/compressing the body
- vomiting, double vision, ringing in the eyes, and vertigo
- cerebrospinal fluid pressure above normal 7 - 20 cm
- normal reading (negative) in CT scan
Causes:
Cerebrospinal fluid pressure on the nerves, including optic causing inflamation. Connection with female hormones and overweight.
Prevention:
Keeping the weight and cardio-vascular system healthy by proper exercise and healthy diet.
Marathon Monks of Mount Hiei.
They run every day for 1000 days.
After 700 days they fast for 9 days: No water, no food, no rest.
Last 100 days they run twice the distance of marathon every day.
By the time they finish they cover the distance of the circumference of the Earth.
After 700 days they fast for 9 days: No water, no food, no rest.
Last 100 days they run twice the distance of marathon every day.
By the time they finish they cover the distance of the circumference of the Earth.
Today I actually met a person who said "I am reading [books] only when I have to, it is a vacation, so I am not reading any...]
I have 7 boxes of books packed, ready to move, and I cannot even see any difference on the shelves. I think I will need 70 boxes to move all my books.
Shall I comment on that person? Maybe not, not worth it.
I have 7 boxes of books packed, ready to move, and I cannot even see any difference on the shelves. I think I will need 70 boxes to move all my books.
Shall I comment on that person? Maybe not, not worth it.
Dear readers, I am sorry, you will die from the boredom -- yes, I spent another day painting with Maja's help. The good news are that tomorrow morning I will be done and maybe I will take a picture of the new place. I am so excited.
I spent some more time on the pool, my new place really feels like a resort place to me, life is a vacation! Except maybe that the painting was very taxing and all my muscles are in pain. I am really getting in shape, I did not loose any weight, but I can see and feel the difference.
Other than that I am reading a book about marathon monks from Japanese Mount Hiei. I will write up on that when I am done (this is my second read of that book).
I spent some more time on the pool, my new place really feels like a resort place to me, life is a vacation! Except maybe that the painting was very taxing and all my muscles are in pain. I am really getting in shape, I did not loose any weight, but I can see and feel the difference.
Other than that I am reading a book about marathon monks from Japanese Mount Hiei. I will write up on that when I am done (this is my second read of that book).
After a day of painting I got a first swim in the swimming pool. Nice! Water is much nicer than most of the pools I experienced before, deep, 8 ft. at the deep end. Most of the folk at the pool are Polish. I guess I landed Poland-town. Tomorrow, I hope will the last day of painting the walls. Wooden furniture is next.
I spent my time reading about male circumcision, a thought provoked by my recent baby-care class and a slight possibility that the girl I am expecting will be a boy.
The only reason I even waste my time reading up is because of the possible social pressure a young boy may experience in certain parts of USA (currently 60% circumcision and dropping).
It is no longer an issue elsewhere, and never has been in Europe. Except of Jewish and Muslim faiths.
After reading the pros and cons, I did not change my mind about the procedure. It does not take a genius to figure out that being born in Europe I am NOT circumsized, which never really bothered me (mostly showers in USMC, or the gyms).
My opinion?
It is a BARBARIC customary mutilation that should be illegal in the same degree as female circumcision is today.
http://www.cirp.org/pages/parents/FAQ/
The only reason I even waste my time reading up is because of the possible social pressure a young boy may experience in certain parts of USA (currently 60% circumcision and dropping).
It is no longer an issue elsewhere, and never has been in Europe. Except of Jewish and Muslim faiths.
After reading the pros and cons, I did not change my mind about the procedure. It does not take a genius to figure out that being born in Europe I am NOT circumsized, which never really bothered me (mostly showers in USMC, or the gyms).
My opinion?
It is a BARBARIC customary mutilation that should be illegal in the same degree as female circumcision is today.
http://www.cirp.org/pages/parents/FAQ/
This is not to propagate hate, but as a food-for-though...
There are millions of very good people who claim to be muslim, let them live long in peace. Then again there are millions of fanatics.
Who is a religious fanatic? That, I will let you answer yourself.
I found this on the Internet, it had a very strong effect on me, don't take it as a hate message, rather as an alert that religion that takes over the life, instead embracing it is highly DANGEROUS.
quote......
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of PanAm Flight 103!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the World Trade Center in 1993!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the Marine barracks in Lebanon!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the military barracks in Saudi Arabia!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the American Embassies in Kenya, East Africa!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the USS COLE!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM attack on the Twin Towers on 9/11/2001!
REMEMBER all the AMERICAN lives that were lost in those vicious MUSLIM attacks!
Now the United States Postal Service REMEMBERS and HONORS the EID MUSLIM holiday season with a commemorative first class holiday postage stamp.
REMEMBER to adamantly and vocally BOYCOTT this stamp when purchasing your stamps at the post office. To use this stamp would be a slap in the face to all those AMERICANS who died at the hands of those whom this stamp honors.
REMEMBER to pass this along to every patriotic AMERICAN you know.�
There are millions of very good people who claim to be muslim, let them live long in peace. Then again there are millions of fanatics.
Who is a religious fanatic? That, I will let you answer yourself.
I found this on the Internet, it had a very strong effect on me, don't take it as a hate message, rather as an alert that religion that takes over the life, instead embracing it is highly DANGEROUS.
quote......
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of PanAm Flight 103!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the World Trade Center in 1993!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the Marine barracks in Lebanon!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the military barracks in Saudi Arabia!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the American Embassies in Kenya, East Africa!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the USS COLE!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM attack on the Twin Towers on 9/11/2001!
REMEMBER all the AMERICAN lives that were lost in those vicious MUSLIM attacks!
Now the United States Postal Service REMEMBERS and HONORS the EID MUSLIM holiday season with a commemorative first class holiday postage stamp.
REMEMBER to adamantly and vocally BOYCOTT this stamp when purchasing your stamps at the post office. To use this stamp would be a slap in the face to all those AMERICANS who died at the hands of those whom this stamp honors.
REMEMBER to pass this along to every patriotic AMERICAN you know.�
Spent whole day painting the new place. I managed to put a first layer of ceiling flat white paint in both bedrooms and the living room. I am using a roller with its own paint storage in the handle. This makes for no splash painting with few trips to the paint can, but it is a heavy workout painting ceilings like that. Kinga and Jacek helped.
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Ji was walking by the lake today and the bird shit on her head. Not a big pile of shit, I guess, but funny shit, that is sure.
People say for good luck.
People say for good luck.
I run 5 miles today in 40 minutes, I wish I could drop it to 35 minutes, that would bring me to my "normal" health level.
If I drop it to 30 minutes, I will be good with the USMC standards.
Long ways, my heart wanted to jump out of my chest.
If I drop it to 30 minutes, I will be good with the USMC standards.
Long ways, my heart wanted to jump out of my chest.
We closed on the deal on the condo today. Went without major events. Took about 1.5 hours. Our lawer John T. is pretty cool guy. He also has a '86 Toy Supra.
I am getting the posession of the place tomorrow night, really cannot wait! Especially the swimming pool sounds good.
I am getting the posession of the place tomorrow night, really cannot wait! Especially the swimming pool sounds good.
So with the previous post the Adexs, formerly MSDSonline, formerly fob, becomes an empty vessel to me. Three years of a very hard work and nothing to look back to.
Out of the many people I hired and/or trained almost nobody is left, Ting Zheng is hanging there as the DBA.
Here are the people that came to my team and are gone:
- Kareem, Maya, Rahul, Vincent, Ann, Surabh, Padmaja, Gameboy, Scott
also:
- three Chief Technology Officers (my bosses: Adrian, Pat and Atul),
- one Chief Executive Officer (I followed from RollingStone.com),
- two administrative assistants (Jeanine and Brenda, whom I credit for this job)
- two founders of MSDSonline: Adrian and Kyle Pope who hired me...
so with Kareem quitting this shall be the end of that chapter for me, no (good) legacy left.
Goodbye ADEXS, aka fob, aka MSDSonline.com!
Out of the many people I hired and/or trained almost nobody is left, Ting Zheng is hanging there as the DBA.
Here are the people that came to my team and are gone:
- Kareem, Maya, Rahul, Vincent, Ann, Surabh, Padmaja, Gameboy, Scott
also:
- three Chief Technology Officers (my bosses: Adrian, Pat and Atul),
- one Chief Executive Officer (I followed from RollingStone.com),
- two administrative assistants (Jeanine and Brenda, whom I credit for this job)
- two founders of MSDSonline: Adrian and Kyle Pope who hired me...
so with Kareem quitting this shall be the end of that chapter for me, no (good) legacy left.
Goodbye ADEXS, aka fob, aka MSDSonline.com!
Kareem is going back to Nigeria.
What a talented and hard working young man. I hope his life is good and everything goes well. I hope he will find the religious answers he has been seeking for so long.
Good luck Kareem, you have brought so much to our lives... thank you very much for all that you have done for us. I hope we will meet many more times in our lives, always in the good circumstamences.
Best of luck!
What a talented and hard working young man. I hope his life is good and everything goes well. I hope he will find the religious answers he has been seeking for so long.
Good luck Kareem, you have brought so much to our lives... thank you very much for all that you have done for us. I hope we will meet many more times in our lives, always in the good circumstamences.
Best of luck!
I just have seen the French movie "Amelie" with Audrey Tautou. Wonderful movie, full of those little things that make up the life. The head and the soul are so full of those. They come from the childhood, they live with us, yet our peers hardly, or never, see them. Things that are inside of us, invisible, hidden behind of the dust blankets of the adulthood's years of amnesia.
Does the romantic love last? It surely does in the vacum of time, but if it doesn't in the real life then still, we should cherish it. One of the most beatiful of our traits. Like all in the life it is just a moment that comes and goes, but sometimes that moment cements it's image in our memories and stays there forever. Those images build up, and build our personalities.
How many people have seen even and inch of the mile long iceberg that froze my memories into my soul? All they see is a dark calm waters, endless abyss, occasional stir. As if I had no past, no life inside, as if I was a piece of machinery designed to exist in the present, as if I was a furniture that is being moved from one corner of the room to another.
Buddhist minds try to live here-and-now, I do too, but without the past we are nothing, do not exist, are worthless. We can understand now only in the context of the past. We can only see ourselves only in that context. Without that perspective we are no better than machines, bio-phisical bodies, flesh, dirt...
Who remembers the most romantic moments of my life, my wife, my ex-girlfriends, no! None of them do have any idea. My best friends might, but maybe not. What a shame since those are the fundamental memories of my life, a ruler I measure everything else by.
Today, I measured the movie by that rule and it scored high. Little things that make us alive and make as want to live and dream.
Does the romantic love last? It surely does in the vacum of time, but if it doesn't in the real life then still, we should cherish it. One of the most beatiful of our traits. Like all in the life it is just a moment that comes and goes, but sometimes that moment cements it's image in our memories and stays there forever. Those images build up, and build our personalities.
How many people have seen even and inch of the mile long iceberg that froze my memories into my soul? All they see is a dark calm waters, endless abyss, occasional stir. As if I had no past, no life inside, as if I was a piece of machinery designed to exist in the present, as if I was a furniture that is being moved from one corner of the room to another.
Buddhist minds try to live here-and-now, I do too, but without the past we are nothing, do not exist, are worthless. We can understand now only in the context of the past. We can only see ourselves only in that context. Without that perspective we are no better than machines, bio-phisical bodies, flesh, dirt...
Who remembers the most romantic moments of my life, my wife, my ex-girlfriends, no! None of them do have any idea. My best friends might, but maybe not. What a shame since those are the fundamental memories of my life, a ruler I measure everything else by.
Today, I measured the movie by that rule and it scored high. Little things that make us alive and make as want to live and dream.
I have just finished an excellent book, I would highly recomment the read to anybody. It is lifting and inpiring. The title is "Ultimate High - My Everest Odyssey" by Goran Kropp. It is very unfortunate to find out that the author died in the accident four years after the book's action takes place. You can find additional information at http://www.kroppaventyr.se/
Today I have run about 7 miles and walked additional one. Bryn Mawr - Belmont Harbour and back. The heart, lungs, joints and muscles did not complain at all.
I decided not to starve the body. After the last run I decided to carry a Powerbar with me and eat it at the mid-point.
The sun and the heat really got to me. Even with plenty of water drank, I started to have cold-chills which are a sign of the heat exhaustion. I had the headache until the late evening. After the run I spent some time sitting in the lake's shallow water enjoying the cool water and a nice sunny day. Got some sun-tan, too.
I decided not to starve the body. After the last run I decided to carry a Powerbar with me and eat it at the mid-point.
The sun and the heat really got to me. Even with plenty of water drank, I started to have cold-chills which are a sign of the heat exhaustion. I had the headache until the late evening. After the run I spent some time sitting in the lake's shallow water enjoying the cool water and a nice sunny day. Got some sun-tan, too.
Soka Gakkai
Yesterday, on Wednesday, I went to the meeting to the local chapter of the Soka Gakkai. The meeting was held in one of the member's apartament in the Sheridan Towers. The meeting was a full-house. The people were nice.
It appears to me that the SGI is aiming at the average folk with their own daily problems. There was not much of in-depth Buddism's understanting, just a faith that chants will bring you the answers in life.
During the meeting, and after the chants, the bowl with various buddhist quotations was passed around to be discussed.
Since that was my first visit I dicided to speak about the quote I have gotten and therefore introduce myself.
"We grow strong when tested by fierce winds. They kindle our fighting spirit into vigorous flame. This is the essence of Soka Gakkai spirit."
I spoke of the bodhisattva Fudo-myo-o, a dweler of the realm of hell, that came in the vision to the Nichiren (patriarch of SGI) as he meditated. I stressed the importance of the visualization of the Fudo-myo-o's cutting sword as a way of cutting thru the delusions of this life and achieving clarity thru our meditations.
Fudo-myo-o is a fierce looking bodhisattva sitting in the throne of fire and holding the sword, it is frequently called upon in the difficult moments when one has to get thru a particularly difficult and stressful time. There is no problem in Buddhism to call upon such visualizations, yet we shall remember that the full enlightenment we will achive only after we put all the delusions behind, after we cut thru the problems. Buddha was teaching to his deciples, "be your own lantern"...
I hope that at least some of the people understood.
Today, I studied the life of Hakuin and his struggle with ego. That understanding would help me to transend from the realm of realization to the realm of bodhisattvas.
It appears to me that the SGI is aiming at the average folk with their own daily problems. There was not much of in-depth Buddism's understanting, just a faith that chants will bring you the answers in life.
During the meeting, and after the chants, the bowl with various buddhist quotations was passed around to be discussed.
Since that was my first visit I dicided to speak about the quote I have gotten and therefore introduce myself.
"We grow strong when tested by fierce winds. They kindle our fighting spirit into vigorous flame. This is the essence of Soka Gakkai spirit."
I spoke of the bodhisattva Fudo-myo-o, a dweler of the realm of hell, that came in the vision to the Nichiren (patriarch of SGI) as he meditated. I stressed the importance of the visualization of the Fudo-myo-o's cutting sword as a way of cutting thru the delusions of this life and achieving clarity thru our meditations.
Fudo-myo-o is a fierce looking bodhisattva sitting in the throne of fire and holding the sword, it is frequently called upon in the difficult moments when one has to get thru a particularly difficult and stressful time. There is no problem in Buddhism to call upon such visualizations, yet we shall remember that the full enlightenment we will achive only after we put all the delusions behind, after we cut thru the problems. Buddha was teaching to his deciples, "be your own lantern"...
I hope that at least some of the people understood.
Today, I studied the life of Hakuin and his struggle with ego. That understanding would help me to transend from the realm of realization to the realm of bodhisattvas.
I am trying to get back to top-notch shape for the little competition we planned with my younger step-brother. All is fine, but he is a varsity gymnist, and very good at it, he looks like the Hulk, and I, on the other hand, spent last several years in front of the computers.
Yesterday I run from the Hollywood beach to the North Beach, and back. I am not sure how far but I think total of 10-12 miles. I am hurting today, really hurting.
Yesterday I run from the Hollywood beach to the North Beach, and back. I am not sure how far but I think total of 10-12 miles. I am hurting today, really hurting.
from The Red Queen book...
"Two industries relentlessly exploit the sexual fantasizing of men and women: pornography and the publishing of romance novels." Nota bene, both equally detached from reality of life.
"[...] whereas pictures of naked (anonymous) men are not especially arousing to women. "A propensity to be aroused merely by the sight of males would promote random matings from which female would have nothing to gain reproductively and a great deal to loose."
Interestingly, in studies, both men and women are a aroused by lesbian scenes, as men are interested in active sex and women are interested in their own responses.
"Two industries relentlessly exploit the sexual fantasizing of men and women: pornography and the publishing of romance novels." Nota bene, both equally detached from reality of life.
"[...] whereas pictures of naked (anonymous) men are not especially arousing to women. "A propensity to be aroused merely by the sight of males would promote random matings from which female would have nothing to gain reproductively and a great deal to loose."
Interestingly, in studies, both men and women are a aroused by lesbian scenes, as men are interested in active sex and women are interested in their own responses.
from Red Queen...
genetically, universally, "[...] while women pay attention to clues of wealth and power, men pay attention to clues of health and youth."
I am glad that sociologists finally get that out of the way because people can only go so far on the guilt of not being so-and-so, such-and-such...
genetically, universally, "[...] while women pay attention to clues of wealth and power, men pay attention to clues of health and youth."
I am glad that sociologists finally get that out of the way because people can only go so far on the guilt of not being so-and-so, such-and-such...
Believe, or not, as much as we all dream about long vacation away from the desk, it is not that rosy as it appears.
Yes, it has been almost 2 months since I had a job. I spend my days washing dishes and cleaning house, reading smart books and magazines, buying "tall mocha coconut frapuchinos" in Starbucks and sitting there for hours.
the www.greenTeaSilks.com is not doing great, it is selling few sexy Havaiana flip-flops, but otherwise it is stagnant, no great hopes there to get rich.
I've bought a 2 bedroom condominium, which took a lot of time and effort, but it is done now, I am waiting for closing.
So, other than educating myself in bio-informatics/genetics, which may take years before I am any good, there is not much (productive) for me to do.
Suma-sumarum, I am thinking to join the workforce again.
Wife is the only person I talk to on the daily bases and, sorry to say, that is not enough, I need stimulation, books, chats are OK, but they will not do. I need challenge and purpose in life.
Yes, it has been almost 2 months since I had a job. I spend my days washing dishes and cleaning house, reading smart books and magazines, buying "tall mocha coconut frapuchinos" in Starbucks and sitting there for hours.
the www.greenTeaSilks.com is not doing great, it is selling few sexy Havaiana flip-flops, but otherwise it is stagnant, no great hopes there to get rich.
I've bought a 2 bedroom condominium, which took a lot of time and effort, but it is done now, I am waiting for closing.
So, other than educating myself in bio-informatics/genetics, which may take years before I am any good, there is not much (productive) for me to do.
Suma-sumarum, I am thinking to join the workforce again.
Wife is the only person I talk to on the daily bases and, sorry to say, that is not enough, I need stimulation, books, chats are OK, but they will not do. I need challenge and purpose in life.
Camp Sheridan, USMC
There are few things as refreshing as a mid-week lake shore in a remote place.
Welcome nature!
P.S. The area of Camp Sheridan was subsequently converted to suburb development, which is good, but it lost some mystique to me.
Fortunately, I know such place. Ever since the Marines and my Reserves duty that followed I was visiting the beach in Camp Sheridan.
42°13'21.7"N 87°48'27.0"W
Previously, it had the vehicle access the the beach, but now they closed it off with the big signs "Government Property" and the chain across the road, so it became nice and quiet.
Today, on it's two miles of the shore there was only on person there, locals occassionally come, but over all it is an assylum from the city crowd.
Welcome nature!
P.S. The area of Camp Sheridan was subsequently converted to suburb development, which is good, but it lost some mystique to me.
I am reading a book by Matt Ridley, "Red Queen", 4 out of 5 kids are not of the right father. The book is very informative, witty, and entertaining, I highly recommend it. Out of today's chat with a friend... "[...] So, Ann if you find out that all the good ones are taken, do not despair, many generations of our grand-mothers came to the same point and see -- you are such a wonderful specimen".
Wow, it has been almost a year since the last update, kind of cool to see a frame of time frozen on the blog pages. Many things have changed and are still changing in my life, hence, I think, I should start keeping my diary up. It may be a valuable source on memories later on.
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