It was the choice between "Atlas Shrugged" and "Fountainhead". The choice between complicated, sophisticated Dominique, my namesake, and Dagny, the ideal of "objectivism".
These two books are giants of thought, analyzing two different aspects of individuality. Both books explore ideas of personal independence and personal excellence. Both were highly influential in my life.
The triggering reason for this re-read was my recent visit to Europe and meeting many of my old friends, with whom I had many, sometimes heated, discussions. I have met with such a variety of different opinions that it has forced me to re-evaluate my own beliefs.
The anti-current-government opinions in Poland are heard in most of the conversations in the city. In fact, it seems, that every conversation ends in government bashing. I am used, from the USA, that democrats think of republicans as "flat-earth" believing, barely human brutes, right above the apes in intelligence. The republicans are thinking of democrats as communists that never did a single day of honest work in their life and want to re-distribute their hard-won money on the public programs that always fail. This article is not about politics, so I will just say that we all need a large dose of objectivism in our political candidates, journalism, and individual opinions.
Some people I talked to are pro-business, some are extremely leftist, some work hard, and some "hardly work". Most are highly educated, due to excellent and inexpensive public education, but only very few are using their fine education in creative or cerebral endeavors.
My observation was that, with very few, bright exceptions, the ideology was border-lining on religion. I have seen nihilism bordering on religion (I know it is a contradiction in terms). I have seen leftist ideology which I would fully classify as religion. I have seen Catholocism with the level of zeal, our XIV century ancestors would be proud of. I have seen environmentalism which is also a modern religion (I will write about the very positive use of solar panels separately). And, of course, I have seen epicureanism, with many people only thinking about the next glass of wine, the next cigarette (a shock to my system), and the next night's outing. The overarching trend that I noticed was that people had a strong ideology, but very little individual action.
This mix of impressions, plus my own current struggles at work due to a very difficult situation, really made me ask some existential questions. Who should I be and which values should I live by?
The "Atlas Shrugged" book provides a simple answer, "I should live by my own standards that are hard-won in years of struggle and refined by my own experiences and hundreds of books I have read."
It is a 1200 pager, so I probably will add to and re-write this post a few more times before I am done with it.

